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“The Dark Tower” is an Epic Misfire

The Dark Tower book series, Stephen King’s epic magnum opus, totals nearly 4,500 pages over 8 books and a few side-stories. The Dark Tower, the film, clocks in at a shockingly-lean 95 minutes including credits. It’s just the first indicator that this quasi-adaptation/quasi-sequel to King’s…

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“Atomic Blonde”: The 80s Greatest Hits

Over the course of the insane beat-‘em-up Atomic Blonde, Charlize Theron stabs, shoots, punches, kicks, chokes, throws, and otherwise brutalizes an endless cast of enemies that’s as large as anything John Wick, Jason Bourne, or James Bond ever took on. And she does it all in stiletto heels,…

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Valerian Is Worth A Thousand Pictures

If a picture is worth a thousand words, the inverse must be true for Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets, the latest film by writer/director Luc Besson. Returning to the space opera genre 20 years after his similarly colorful and vibrant The Fifth Element, Valerian takes that film’s visuals…

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“Spider-Man” Does Whatever A Reboot Can

The opening moments of Spider-Man: Homecoming let the audience know exactly what kind of film we’re about to watch. While the epically grandiose Marvel Studios logo unfolds on screen, a small army of strings plays the theme to the Spider-Man cartoon from 1967 fortissimo con brio. It’s an…

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The Dark Tower book series, Stephen King’s epic magnum opus, totals nearly 4,500 pages over 8 books and a few side-stories. The Dark Tower, the film, clocks in at a shockingly-lean 95 minutes including credits. It’s just the first indicator…

arrow

Over the course of the insane beat-‘em-up Atomic Blonde, Charlize Theron stabs, shoots, punches, kicks, chokes, throws, and otherwise brutalizes an endless cast of enemies that’s as large as anything John Wick, Jason Bourne, or James…

arrow

If a picture is worth a thousand words, the inverse must be true for Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets, the latest film by writer/director Luc Besson. Returning to the space opera genre 20 years after his similarly colorful and vibrant…

arrow

The opening moments of Spider-Man: Homecoming let the audience know exactly what kind of film we’re about to watch. While the epically grandiose Marvel Studios logo unfolds on screen, a small army of strings plays the theme to the Spider-Man…

arrow

Previously...on Fanboys of the Universe

Few things are more necessary to a film — indeed, to life in general — than the proper soundtrack, and few directors… Read More »

A running gag in the Robert Altman film The Player revolves around movies that are pitched as “X meets Y”, a… Read More »

Despite being one of the most celebrated superheroes of all time, to say nothing of her status as a cultural icon, Wonder… Read More »

If you have to explain a joke to somebody, it’s not funny. The same could be said for horror films. The more you know… Read More »

It could be argued that when The Fifth Element was released to theaters, the world wasn’t prepared for it. The advertisements… Read More »

The right soundtrack can make or break a movie, especially one as big, bright, and go-for-broke crazy as Guardians of the… Read More »

Let’s go back in time for a moment, to the halcyon days of the mid-1990s, when AOL, floppy disks, and dial-up modems… Read More »

Some metaphors are big. Some metaphors are small. Some are delivered with all the grace of a sledgehammer to the forehead,… Read More »

There’s something uncanny about the live-action adaptation of Ghost In The Shell. While it isn’t a direct adaptation… Read More »

There’s something admirably valiant about Power Rangers, the most recent attempt to apply a hard and serious reboot… Read More »

How do you go about reproducing the charm and timeless appeal of one of Disney’s most celebrated animated films in… Read More »

Leave it to a superhero film about a character with claws to stab the heart of its audience and make it feel like a handshake.… Read More »

There are so many sudden and extreme moments of brain-nauseating excess in A Cure For Wellness, the new film by director… Read More »

When The Lego Movie arrived in theaters back in 2014, it was something of a surprise. An animated film based on featureless,… Read More »

In the debate over the lack of female superheroes headlining films, one name often gets left out: Milla Jovovich, star of… Read More »

Or as it might better be known, Killing in the Name of the MacGuffin. What is a MacGuffin? Glad you asked. Alfred Hitchcock… Read More »

War is hell. That’s a fact that most of the films in the Star Wars franchise have glossed over, despite the fact that… Read More »

Sometimes we have to look backward to move forward, and that’s especially true in the case of Moana, the latest animated… Read More »

Too often, when something is labeled “science fiction”, it often just means “set in space.” This… Read More »

One thing lacking in both the Marvel and DC Cinematic Universes is something that seems so fundamental to the superhero mythos:… Read More »

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