1. I will not pay more for action figures per month than I do for rent.
2. I will no longer accuse friends and family members of being the 12th Cylon.
(Sorry about Thanksgiving, folks).
3. “Black tie” does not include Batman costumes.
4. I will not call in “Skrull” to work. No one thinks it’s funny.
5. I will stop asking guys at the gym if they want to see my mint condition Giant-Size Man-Thing.
6. “By the power of Grayskull” is not an appropriate response to “Sir, have you been drinking this evening?”
7. I will remove my World of Warcraft skills of “Blacksmithing” and “Mining” from my professional resume.
8. I will stop asking Daniel Radcliffe to sign my chest…with his penis.
9. It is never appropriate to quote The Smurfs at weddings or funerals.
10. I will stop making guys shout “Han shot first! Han shot first!” during sex.
Well, those are mine. Please feel free to add your own resolutions in the comments section!