FBOTU TV Week in Review: Smallbudgetville

We’re getting closer and closer to season finale time, and I can’t wait to see what sort of shocking cliffhangers my favorite shows concoct to make me crazy for the next few months. Will Elena escape Klaus only to get abducted by aliens? Will Olivia wake up to find the original Peter Bishop alive and well and taking a shower? Will we find out that Smallville was all in the mind of an autistic Kryptonian? I can’t wait to find out!

image Doctor Who “Day of the Moon”

This episode has so much stuff crammed into it, I don’t even know where to begin. There isn’t a wasted moment, either, as every second of screen time is filled with some brutal event, raw emotion or shocking revelation. We’re still no closer to finding out the deal with the Doctor’s apparent death at the beginning of the previous episode. So, either that’s going to be a season-long mystery to solve, or perhaps it’s related to the strange events at the very end of this episode. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and regenerates like a duck, is it a duck? Also particularly compelling in this episode is River Song’s lip lock with the Doctor, as well as her subsequent confusion about whether or not they’d done that before. Is it possible the Doctor isn’t the right Doctor at the moment? Did River just not sync up their diaries correctly? I think mistaken identities and multiple identities will play a part in this season, especially where the Doctor, Amy and the mysterious “spaceman” girl are concerned. And here’s hoping we see Canton Everett Delaware III again (though he told the gang that wouldn’t happen). Leave it to a British show, doing a story arc in the US, to try to bring a little tolerance to foreign shores. Thanks for visiting a “planet called America.” Y’all come back soon!
image Fringe “The Last Sam Weiss”

Excuse me, Fringe Division. But the drawings you’ve all been freaking out about for two seasons clearly show a SHIRTLESS Peter Bishop in the machine. So, you’ve got a lot of nerve putting Peter in there with his shirt on. Also, remember last week, when I suspected that the real Peter might still be alive somewhere? Well, forget I said that. In this week’s episode, we get a hint that the machine might actually be capable of “re-setting” alt Peter. I wonder if re-setting him will heal both universes somehow? And the only way to save everyone is to erase our universe from alt Peter’s memory? And Peter from Olivia’s memory. This is hurting my head now, so I’m going to just erase it all from my memory.
image Game of Thrones “Lord Snow”

It’s funny that my complaints about the quality of female characters on this show are starting to fade. Queen Cersei is clearly in some sort of competition to win the title of Worst Mother/Sister Ever. She’s a total megabitch, but kind of interesting to watch. Meanwhile, Queen wannabe Daenerys is starting to flex those Lady Macbeth muscles she developed last week. It’s good to be the queen, even a barbarian queen. Finally, my favorite female character now is little Arya Stark. She’s tough; she’s honest; and she’s got a sword. I look forward to her killing Prince Draco Malfoy. I had planned to let the quality of this week’s episode determine whether I continue with the series, or, if like Camelot, I erase it forever from my DVR. I think I’ll give it another episode, if only to see if the bastard Stark son turns out to be gay. I’ve got a feeling about him.
image Smallville “Dominion”

I’m relieved this show is ending, because it always makes me feel so bad for the set decorator, who is routinely called upon to create alternate universes or interdimensional prisons or superhero crime labs with a weekly budget of about $3.99. This week’s episode featured a trip to the Phantom Zone, which is, in fact, an abandoned catering tent set up on a beach in Oxnard, CA. Saving the K-Mart blue light special on display is Clark Kent’s fight with leather bikini-clad gladiators in the Phantom Zone. All of which brings up a few questions that maybe some of our diehard Superman experts can answer. First, assuming people end up in the Phantom Zone as a punishment, why are they also supplied with weapons with which to stage little gladiator battles? Second, did a Hollywood cosmetic orthodontist get banished to the Phantom Zone? Because Zod has some beautiful teeth. At least you can always count on Oliver to take his shirt off and get locked up in a cage. I’ll miss you most of all, Oliver.
image Supernatural “Mommy Dearest”

Okay. Now we’re talking! This is the Supernatural I know and love, the one that lures me into thinking I know what’s going on, and then completely turns it around. In this episode, the boys finally come face to shifting face with Eve (aka Mother of all Demons). It’s more of an exposition conference than a battle, which is fine, since Sam and Dean get some valuable information before things get crazy. As we head into the finale, I wonder if the re-direction is also a re-direction, or if this is the real thing?
image The Vampire Diaries “The Last Day”

For two seasons I’ve been a champion of this show, which continues to surprise and amuse me in many ways. All along, I’ve looked upon the beautiful teens as well-meaning fashion models trapped in a world not of their making. Now, however, the show is feeling more and more like the anti-Buffy. In Buffy, the cool kids were monster food, while the geeks and outcasts saved the world. In VD, the cool kids are the monsters, and since they make it look so cool and they’re all so gorgeous, it’s beginning to feel more and more like a real high school. Luckily, the outrageous product placement helps keep things from getting too real. This week, Klaus, the king of the vampires, demonstrates the benefits of having a smartphone that plugs into the back of your laptop. Truly, in the middle of an otherwise dramatic moment, it’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen in my life, and I’ve seen every episode of True Blood. Rounding out this unusually wacky episode is the most inappropriate hiking scene ever filmed, once again driving home the concept of befuddled supermodels trying to survive in the real world somehow. Note to dreamy vampires and Petrova doppelgangers: your heels are fabulous, but they’re not useful hiking attire. I am sorry.

What shows are you watching this week? Let us know your thoughts/suggestions in the comments section below!

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