Toys & Merch

7” of Pale Vampire Dreaminess

Why, Mr. Cullen! You’re so pale and brooding, you could have any awkward, clumsy, introspective outcast girl you want, but you chose me! Let’s go pout and look pained and beautiful together. Then maybe I can get a piece of that shiny white ass.

Ahem. Too far?

Oh, well. Edward Cullen is so sexy, he can barely stand on his own, which translates beautifully into an action figure, since they can barely stand either. You can pre-order this new NECA creation from your favorite online retailer. Get two! You can have them glower sullenly at each other for all eternity.

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