Toys & Merch

Don’t Make Him Angry


Oh boy, am I happy to see this gorgeous piece of man plastic. Not only is it a fabulous likeness of dreamy Christian Bale, but it’s also got 36 points of articulation! Real, live humans don’t even have 36 points of articulation! And believe me, his articulation and detail are going to come in handy for my dramatic re-enactments of Mr. Bale’s widely-publicized meltdown on the set of Terminator Salvation. But I’m not going to stop there. I intend to have him berate and belittle all of my toys, too. Look out, Luke Skywalker, Mr. Bale is your daddy now. Sorry, Evil-Lyn, there’s a new bitch in town, and she’s got a British accent! He will bring order and respect to my toy shelf. If not, he will f***ing kick some f***ing ass!



The John Connor 12-inch figure comes with leather jacket, pants, t-shirt, tactical full-body harness, headset, radio with pouch, M4 magazine pouches, pistol magazine pouch, demolition blocks, drop leg panel, armband, patch, assault boots, tactical gloves, M4A1 with tactical red dot sight, XM-26 LSS, line launcher, pistol with holster, tactical fixed blade and a box of Do-Si-Do Girl Scout Cookies (just seeing if you’re paying attention). This sucker will be available this fall and will retail for approximately $130. Get more info and see more pics at Sideshow Collectibles. Better pre-order it now, or he will f***ing go off on you!

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