Open Apology to Bank of America

I have one of those all-in-one office machines that has a scanner, fax, copier and printer. And like most all-in-one machines, you can never really count on all the features to work all the time, but I digress. One of my credit cards was recently compromised when someone who was not me tried to use it to buy $500 worth of lamps in Michigan. Weird. Anyway, Bank of America reluctantly agreed to replace the card and reverse the charges, on the condition that I sign and fax them an affidavit swearing I wasn’t trying to pull some sort of lamp scam. I put the affidavit pages in the all-in-one machine and pressed the “Fax” button. I then returned to my usual online antics until I heard the affirmative beep that signals a successful transmission. When I turned back to the machine, though, my affidavit pages were still in the feeder tray. But the screen said the fax was successful. It was then I realized that something was in the scanner. Oh…no. Please, God of All-in-One Machines, don’t let a naked picture of Peter Parker still be in the scanner. Please?

For last week’s Comics Load, I scanned a page of Spider-Man featuring Peter Parker prancing around his apartment naked. Yes, I faxed naked Peter Parker to Bank of America. Take a look:


Will sending them a naked shot of Spider-Man help my case? I don’t know. I can only hope there’s a Fanboy of the Universe in charge of checking the fax machine at B of A. Maybe he’ll send me a naked picture of Thor in return!

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