Fringe: Baby Batter Blues

This week’s episode of Fringe, “A Better Human Being,” reminds me of every relationship I’ve ever been in. Namely, a guy suddenly discovers he likes me, then friends, family and a team of scientists show up to convince him he’s been brainwashed. It generally ends badly, just like this episode.

While Walter tries to figure out why Olivia suddenly loves Peter and remembers their time(line) together, the Fringe team investigates a mental patient who finds the voices in his head are committing murders in the real world. We’ve all been there, am I right? No? Okay. It doesn’t take the team long to identify the voices as the genetic half bothers of the patient. Seems a fertility doc wanted to make some improvements to the basic human model by implanting genetically modified offspring into his patients’ wombs. Secret ingredient: his own man goo.

Since his offspring share a “hive mind,” they start working together to off anyone who gets close to learning the icky truth of their origin, like reporters and Fringe agents.

Meanwhile, Walter thinks he’s discovered what’s messing with Olivia’s head, memories and lips: recent doses of Cortexiphan! And guess who has the only supply of Cortexiphan in the world? Massive Dynamic! Oo! I knew that Nina was injecting Olivia with something bad! You all tried to tell me it was just B12, but I knew better. So does Walter. He goes to see Nina and takes Lincoln along as muscle. Lincoln adds buckets of tension to the scenes with Nina, too, since he has no reason to trust her or believe anything she says. Yay, Lincoln!

We’re soon treated to a rare glimpse of Nina’s fingers as she bio unlocks the vials of Cortexiphan. Someday I’m going to start a band called Nina’s Fingers, and we’ll only play songs about Blair Brown. All of the vials are present and accounted for, but Walter does a taste test and discovers they’ve been filled with potassium iodide, and as we all know, Cortexiphan tastes more like watermelon Pucker.

While I’m glad that Olivia gets her memory back, I’m worried that Peter is losing his. Shouldn’t he know by now that if you’re going to declare your love for someone on Fringe, you shouldn’t let them out of your sight?! Sure enough, as soon as he and Olivia re-affirm their undying love for one another, Olivia tell his to hold that thought; she’ll be right back. Stupid Olivia. Stupid Peter. I’m not even on Fringe, and I know not to let someone out of my sight once they’ve accepted and/or returned my affections.

Olivia goes to a gas station bathroom, but ends up semi-conscious and tied to a chair. We’ve all been there, am I right? And she’s not alone. A version of Nina is there, too! Also tied to a chair. She assures Olivia that everything is going to be okay, but no one believes her, and even she seems to have a hard time saying it with a straight face.

There are so many value-laden lessons to be gleaned from this episode. Let’s recap, shall we?

1. Make sure your fertility doctor isn’t trying to repopulate the earth with his own semen. If you’re not sure, take Walter along to do a taste test.
2. Don’t let Not Nina gain the upper hand, gloved or not.
3. If someone is even remotely nice to you, don’t ever let them out of your sight, no matter what the restraining orders say.

Fringe is on Fridays at 9/8c on Fox. Watch it! And be sure to keep up with all of FBOTU’s Fringe recaps here.

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